Feeling This
by Midori no danna
Summary: High School Fic with absolutely everyone. Dorms are messed up, Ino says Sasori is a rapist and Hidan is getting 'punished' by Orochimaru.
1. Chapter 1

I know I shouldn't abandon some of my stories but this one was just calling to me. Stories spinning left and right, I'll keep updating though.

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"You know, you're not going to get anywhere just staring at him. Though he might get a restraining order and call you a stalker." Sakura Haruno could not stop staring at him though. She was just too jealous. "Whatever, keep stalking him, see if I care."

The person talking to her just happened to be a red head that shouldn't have put her two-sense into staring at people. The girl who tried to drug her own friends to rape a guy who would so beat her ass.

At the table Sakura was staring at happened to be an odd combination. "Little brother, I don't understand why she always stares at you; her motives make no sense to me. I fear I don't understand which makes me weak." Itachi sat back down and had a sad little frown on his face for he had to know everything.

"Shut up Aniki, don't mention that pink, little retrovirus to me."

"D-don't talk about Sakura-chan like that, you fucking bastard… Idiot." A cute, blonde made a pout and his eyes slitted dangerously. The dark haired kid just looked at him while lounging in his seat.

"My, my. I'm sorry; I didn't know you had a crush on…that…hmm a good name to call her… Sakura… sorry for the inconvenience Naru, couldn't insult your 'lover'." Said blonde was not happy. His face was red from Sasuke's little comment. He chose to just let it go though.

"I fucking hate UNIFORMS! Plus these lunches taste like WEEK OLD JIZ!"

"You would know." Hidan looked down at his cousin. Tayuya just smirked at him. The girls' uniform consisted of a white button down shirt with a plaid grey and grey skirt. Same for the guys but with pants. They could add school things to them like, the icky, maroon sweaters, the 'Spirit' shirts, or a number of things that deemed appropriate. Hidan however, chose to not button his shirt at all.

The two sat at the lunch table next to Itachi's table.

The school had just been built during the summer. Only exceptionally gifted students were allowed to come here. You couldn't apply, they came for you. The rules were strict on what they could do involving those particular skills, you got a chakra repressor installed into your system. This, they thought, would limit all conflict with power and fights.

"Attention! Attention!! ATTENTION YOU INFERIOR DEGENERATES!" The principal, Tsunade Senju. The most feared woman in the world possibly, ok no but she was scary. She stood in her big-breasted glory in front of the gym with a microphone. "Welcome, I know some of you may have a couple friends here, but get ready to get more."

"I'd like to be your friend Lady Tsunade!" In the crowd stood Sai waving frantically. He was socially retarded so there was no double meaning to his words either. He was damn serious about his friends. He stopped waving and waited for her reaction with a smile on his face.

"Sure Sai, I'd love to be your friend." Her voice was extremely condescending but he did a victory dance, still not getting it.

Hidan burst into laughter. "I'd love for you to punish me Miss Senju; I am a bad boy, but no direct sex. Lord Jashin would not approve. But I could always- he made a sign with his below and pointed to her large 'assets' making vulgar movements.

She smiled at him. "Hidan, I'm not going to punish you but he will." She pointed to Orochimaru who just smiled in his usual Michael Jackson, Snake, skank manor. Hidan's eyes widened in terror.

"Alright, you are going to be set up into dorms, some coed for a couple of people. But if you are not in this exception and are found in the opposite sexes room, you are in deep shit. You already have your schedules and room numbers so good night."

Tsunade stepped into her office and looked at a couple of the dorm room schedules:

**Sakura and Sasuke: No need for Sasuke to get a little too friendly with a certain blonde and Sasuke could take her if anything funny went on.**

"Yes! Sasuke-kun we are together!" 'Now I can get more information about someone.'

"I think God hates me."

**Sasori and Ino: Keeping puppet boy away from a certain other pony-tailed blonde. **

"Uhh who is this Sasori?" Just as the words left her mouth, an old guy with bad posture walked to her.

"Are you Ino?" He said it in his low Hiruko voice.

"Ahhh! RAPIST!"

**Naruto and Lee: I wanted to give the kid hell.**

"Oh, with the power of youthfulness I will make this the best man on man time ever Naruto!"

"Yeah Baby!"

**Matsuri and Gaara: Not like these, two know each other and hopefully Gaara will kill her, she's annoying.**

"Sensei! We're together."

"Oh." 'Good thing Temari told me to come 'prepared.'

**Fuka, Karin, and Tayuya: They all balance each other out. FIRE CROTCH POWER!**

"I have to spend time with an extremely hideous girl and a boy."

"I'd rather be called a boy than ugly, ha-ha bitch."

"I am not hideous! You're just jealous."

"Of what, not having those grotesque hickeys on my neck?"

**All those cloud kids: I don't know.**

"Hey titless and tits galore all of us are sharing a room."

"Shut up… Err." Omoi spat his toothpick at his sister's face. "I hate you…"

**Juugo, Choji, and Zetsu: Have weight problems and are sensitive and or psychotic.**

"Wow, I wonder what great people will bring yummy food."

"H-hi, I'm Juugo."

"Hi, I'm Zetsu. _Shove a stick up your ass!_ Sorry, I have… issues.

**Hidan and Deidara: That would be some hot sado-masochism. I-I mean they both have blonde hair.**

"Unn… I have to be with Hidan-san?"

"Get used to it you blonde, faggy, Son of a whore."

"Unn, you're mom was the one who got knocked up when she was twelve."

"Fuck you, fire cocker."

**Konan and Sai: They love paper and maybe Konan will kill Sai.**

"Konan-san it is an honor to meet you." Sai bowed. Konan walked away.

**Neji and Kiba: They both won't hump Hinata now.**

"Yo, wassup Neji Still got a stick up your ass. Maybe Akamaru should play fetch with it to help you with your problems." Neji just stared at Kiba. The stare he always gave Gai-sensei.

**Hinata and Haku: They both start with H and have long hair.**

"H-hi."

"Hello Hinata." His voice was smooth and velvety, she blushed.

**Shikamaru, Kankuro, and Temari: This should be fun to watch.**

"Troublesome siblings."

"Uhh! A proper greeting would be nice Shika."

"Is this my new brother-in-law, Temari?" She blushed grabbed her fan and SMACK.

**Ten-ten, Kakazu, Sugetsu, and Pein: No one left.**

"Give me your lunch money or die!"

"H-here."

"I like Slushies."

"Die." He looked at a wall and it burst into flames just as Gaara walked by. He bowed down at Pein.

**Itachi: He requested it… fag. **

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Should I continue?


	2. Chapter 2

The first Night in our rooms.

Sasori and Ino

The blonde bit her lip in anticipation. She just happened to be waiting for a certain roommate of her's. She packed lingerie. Somewhere deep inside her heart she thought she might need it. How wrong she was.

An opening of the door brought her back to reality as she peered over at 'him.' He pretended she wasn't even there in the room with him. He unpacked his things silently and all Ino could do was stare. Her eyes boring into him, he could feel it. He looked up at her; she looked away biting the skin on her thumb.

"I'm going to take a shower ok?" When was Ino ever nervous? Why did she feel the need to tell him that? Stupid!

"And, I care why?"

She just stared at him. "I don't want you to be peeping you… rapist!" He exhaled rather loudly.

"I don't know why but you seem to be under the impression that I'm interested in you. I'm not interested in anyone. And no, I'm not gay, I just… don't like being around others."

She frowned. "Oh, well I'll be in the bathroom if you need me." Ino took a purple towel with her and walked to the bathroom inside the dorm room. After she closed the door, she looked at herself in the mirror. Her long hair cascaded down her as she took it down.

She started the water and began undressing more. Her shirt, pants, fishnets, bindings, and underwear. The water was perfect temperature and she hopped in.

Outside the door Sasori laid down on his bed, he thought about the blonde in the room next to him. She was naked and wet, this didn't even arouse him. He thought about her rubbing herself with soap and doing 'other' things, yet this still didn't arouse him. He thought about his friend Deidara. Still nothing.

He heard the water turn off and she stepped out. Her body was glistening with water and under that towel was her bare flesh; this thought crossed his mind but he soon put it out. She cocked her head to the side and looked at him. "Yes."

"Aren't you going to but on night clothes?"

"No, why?" What was the sense of getting nightclothes on; she wasn't seeing my real body.

"Well, you are going to be uncomfortable with that tail of yours and that Akatsuki garb."

"Well woman, you see I don't actually have a tail attached to my body and with being comfortable, it's fine in here." He smirked at himself knowing she wouldn't get it.

Ino thought she would get arise out of this guy; she was going to dress in front of him. In one fluid motion, she threw her towel at him. He yelped like a little boy. She smirked at him and slowly dressed.

"Good night Sasori." Ino went to sleep with a smile on her face. The only thing Sasori was thinking about this was the first time he'd seen a naked woman.

Sakura and Sasuke

"Sasuke-kun isn't this exciting that we are sharing a room together for a WHOLE year. I'm so excited!" She clapped her hands and squealed. He looked at her dumbfounded.

"Again, God hates me."

Asleep he heard some rustling in the bed next to him. Sakura must have been having a dream because she kept murmuring weird things. "Naru." His ears perked up at this. He didn't have a sharingan and master genjutsu for nothing.

He peered into her mind, what he saw shocked him. Sakura naked, Naruto pleasuring her. "Naruto… I'm so glad you don't like Sasuke." He scowled. What did she mean she's so glad he doesn't like me, why would he? Or maybe she thinks I like him. No way in HELL.

He dissipated back into his bed, watching Sakura with a disgusted look on his face. So she didn't like me after all. Hn… Not like a care.

Fuka, Karin, and Tayuya

Karin scowled at Fuka. Fuka smiled. Tayuya sat on her bed playing video games. "Fuck I died!"

"Ty?" The pretty one asked.

"Mmmphh." She turned off the game and turned to face Fuka.

"Do you want anyone dead?" She asked getting excited.

"Uhh, besides Karin, let me think… Not at the moment surprisingly." Karin scowled.

"Do you want to come with me to the bathroom really quick?" She smirked deviously.

"Uhh… sure I guess?" She followed the woman into the bathroom. Fuka looked back and smiled at Karin, who was still scowling.

She looked at the shorter one and put her arms on her. "Listen, I know how we can make Karin really mad. You in?"

"Whatever, as long as it will make the bitch shut up."

"Yes, just listen to what I tell you to do."

Outside of the bathroom, Karin was tapping her foot impatiently with her arms folded across her chest. She had been brainstorming what they were doing in the bathroom, she then heard the water turn on.

Inside the bathroom Ty, almost couldn't help but not laugh out loud. She sat on the toilet while Fuka sat on the sink counter holding in her laugh. "Oh Fuka, your lips are amazing!" She said it breathy and moany.

Outside Karin's eyes widened at what she heard. She put her ear up to the door and started to listen in. Fuka knew she was at the door. She slammed her arms on the door loudly to hurt Karin's ears. "Oh Ty, you just put your flute… oh." She said it the same way as Tayuya had said it earlier.

Karin was still recovering from the damage to her ears but kept on listening. Just then, they both hopped in the showers trying to contain laughter as they both screamed in 'pleasure.' They walked out of the bathroom drenched and they put towels around their bodies and undressed to cover each other up. They opened the steamy room holding hands. Karin's face was bright red and getting redder by the moment.

"I love you Ty." She leaned down and kissed her on the cheek almost motor boating her face from trying to repress laughter.

"You guys are unbelievable! You lilies!"

"Jealous." Her face this time paled.

Hidan Deidara

"Un!"

He looked at the sunflower. "What?"

"You wanna have sex… just kidding!"

He looked at him. His eyebrows furrowed and his mouth opened in disgust. "Hell no. I do not like taking it up in the ass, not being chaste is a sin Deidara. A sin."

He put his finger on his chin and looked up like he was thinking. "Un, so are you saying that if it wasn't against your religion you would." He ended with a smile.

"NO!"

"Kami-sama Hidan-kun, you need to relax. I can help you there."

"I don't want to know what you have in mind. I really, really don't."

He walked up to the taller one and put his hand on his shoulder. "Oh Hidan-kun, I think you do."

"Have fucking lost your mind. I AM NOT HAVING SEX WITH YOU DEIDARA!" It was if the entire world had stopped, yes, everyone had heard. No, their door wasn't open. Maybe, his voice just carried.

"Prude, un." He went back to his bed and continued reading his PlayGirl.

And the first day of classes start

If you didn't already know this I'll tell you. Kakashi-sensei is a pervert. He was even in the classroom, usually flirting with the girls… and sometimes the boys. What you don't know about Kakashi is that he is doing something to one particular student he shouldn't be.

I'm not going to say any names but they met in the summer. Ever since then they've been going at it like bunnies, nymphomaniatic bunnies.

"Class, settle it. I need to take attendance." He looked at his desk tiredly and looked for the attendance marker.

"Late night Kakashi?"

"Whoever said that it is none of your business and yes, I did." That little girl sure had a lot of stamina, there were things she could do that no other grown woman could, and he was her first.

"I'll mix up the names just for fun, how 'bout that." In truth he forgot to alphabetize the names.

"Screw it, what do I care. Let's start with a little Shinobi history, since this is history class. Alright, who can tell me who The Sage of Six Paths was… besides Pein. Naruto."

"Uhh… the sage of six paths is… a seal?" Kakashi smacked his hand onto his forehead.

"I said who, not what. Konan." She picked her head up off her desk and looked at her teacher with her eyes half closed.

"He invented ninjutsu."

"Thank God someone actually knew." He started pacing the classroom trying to waste time. "On the other hand, since this is a new year, let's start it off with a project!" The class of course groaned.

"Kakashi, what are the details of this project?" He rolled his eyes and turned around.

"That is Kakashi-sensei to you Sakura and it can be about anything history related."

Pein rose his hand. "So is Sakura the one your fornicating with?"

Kakashi gave him a disgusted look. "No."

"What's fornicating?"

"Naruto, shut up."

Sasuke looked at the blonde semi-retarded kid and smiled. "Yeah shut up, unless you want to put that mouth where it could be used in a better way."

He squinted. "What's that suppose to mean?"

Pein leaned over. "It means he wants to fornicate with you."

The semi-retard stood up and pointed at the offender . "Sensei, Sasuke wants to fornicate with me!"

Deidara stood up also. "Yeah, un!"

Followed by Sakura. "What?"

Kakashi was not amused. "Everybody sit down!" And they did.

A certain albino then shouted. "Deidara likes gay porn! Itachi wants to fuck his brother! No seriously both those are true. And according to Lord Jashin I must never lie….Sasori has a dick spring so he's always hard!" He smiled to himself proudly for shouting out the truth.

"What do you mean he has a dick spring?" Asked his fire-crotched cousin.

"Glad you asked, I mean SASORI can't normally get hard because he's old and he doesn't get blood flow to his dick so he has a spring penis." Sasori looked at him dead panned.

He stared at Hidan. "Hidan one time chopped of his man parts and they refuse to grow back. Therefore he is without a penis."

Fuka got into the discussion to. "I've always wanted to have sex with a dick-less man."

Sasori looked at the fellow fir-crotch. "Then you'd also enjoy my roommate Ino."

The other blonde idiot stood up. "I am not a dick-less man!" She was fuming.

"Unfortuanately you showed me your naked figure last night and I can conclude you are a dick-less man."

Naruto's eyes widened. "Wow, Ino. Can I see?"

"Naruto!"

"Sorry Sakura, it would be cool to see."

BING

"Well children better get to your next period." He waved.

Second period Science

Temari stood up at the head of the class. "We now have a new student joining us, please welcome Nagato."

Karin shot him a nasty look. "We already have enough lesbian red-heads so he can't join our dorm."

Shikamaru looked bored. "He's going in with the rest of the rejects, the people no one cares about." He fell asleep.

Sai started smiling at the red-head no one wanted. "You can always join out dorm. I''m sure Konan-san wouldn't mind." He kept smiling. Retard.

At this the unwanted fire-crotch smiled. "I can be with Konan!" The lights dimmed.

You're the one I dream about, now the only question with me now is do I creep you out.

Call you every night and hang up, wnanna carve my name in my leg…. In my leeeg!

"Hey bitch, I'm the only fire-crotched stalker here, got that?"

"Alright classs sit down. Who can tell me why cloning is important?"

"Yes Naruto."

"It's important for Orochimaru-sensei to clone so he can make extra copies of Sasuke and make them his slaves."

"That's c-wrong. WRONG!"

"So then what's that noise coming out of your closet. Haha the real Sasuke and the clone Sasuke are the same. They're both stuck in the closet."

He got close to the semi-retard's ear. "Do you want me to come out of the closet so we can fornicate?"

Still not knowing that fornicate meant to have sex with he said ok. That poor retarded blonde. Sasuke led him to an unoccupied corner of the class room.

"Okay, dope listen. Turn around and close your eyes." He did as he was told, wondering the magic of fornication. Sasuke silently unzipped his pants and as fast as he could slipped inside Naruto's ass.

"AHH! Anal PROBE!" The retarded got out of his corner and started running around the classroom screaming, Sasuke still inside.

"That's right doped… Ahhh,…errr… oh baby. Keep running."

"It burns it burns, Sakura-chan help!" The Pink-crotch stood up.

"SASUKE! I was supposed to steal Naruto-kun's virginity. Not you!" He stopped running, the room got quite, a blue monster came in, not really.

Lee's giant eyes widened. "The power of youth is so strong in here, can't you smell it?"

Neji looked at Lee. "No what you smell is sex Lee, a smell your never gonna get to make. Now be quiet."

"Sakura-chan, do you really mean that?" This was the happiest moment of the retard's whole existence.

The thing inside him was none to happy. "Way to kill a mood dumb ass and by the way Naruto. After this your ass is going to be as dumb as you." He did the famous Uchiha smirk.

Way to ruin a good mood. "NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"


End file.
